I pick up the phone to call.
Your response is cold.
Our silence long and hollow.
I lost you.
I try to fill the spaces with moments that once was.
They are ghosts to me now.
I cannot reconcile your life and our death.
So I learn to mourn your loss when I am with you.
by silencing expectations.
and denying the resurrection of disappointment.
I close my eyes when I see you.
Tell myself you are not there.
Not for me.
It takes too long.
your death was neither warranted nor expected.